Teen (LGBTQ)

My teenage wasn’t the way I thought it to be,
Neither the way I dreamt of,
Nor the way others had their’s.

Frequent mood swings,
Endless crying, repenting, struggling,
This was my teenage.
I realized something about my identity.
A truth only I realized, yet.
I was a gay.

Different from every other girl in the class,
It was only me knowing about it.
I didn’t tell any of my friends about it .
They treated me as usual.
As this was what I wanted.

Slowly my identity as a gay spread like an epidemic.
From one person to another to the third and eventually everyone.
I was ruined.
I felt like a baseless chalice.
I couldn’t even hold my emotions.
Frequent crying, heavy minded I lived through my teen life.
It was horrible.
Everyone made it worst.

A separate empty bench used to be left out in the classroom for me ,
Unlike when they used to fight amongst themselves to sit with me.
It was obviously way too hurting.
Wouldn’t it be?
I felt like giving up.
Struggling seemed way too hard.

My teen life didn’t bring any cheers as it did bring in the life of my other classmates.
I was isolated.
Harassment and insomniac nights made their way to my life

I wanted to share my emotions for these compressed emotions were now rotting my soul.
I felt lost.
I was a forlorn figure now, waiting for an angel to take me to the heaven.

Why only me?

Playing computer games for three fourth of my day,
And the left one, let it be crying.
Such was my changed routine .

No friends, no contacts,
Only a girl elder to me by 3 years.
She was the only one to accompany me through my life(what I actually thought).
But I was eventually left alone.
I was fragile throughout this phase.

And,
I felt a need to wake up,
To maintain my identity bold, even though as a gay.
I was proud of myself.
Depressing cries were no more a part of my schedule.

Yes I am a teen,
And a gay.
But how does that even matter.
I look like any other girl,
And I have a brain as much as you have.
Maybe slightly more?
How even does my sexuality bother you?
Rather anyone?

That’s till where you’ve limited your thinking, perhaps?
Come on dude,
Recognise the calibre.
This world is colossal and short minded aren’t long lived.

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So this is a poem about a girl. In India gay and lesbo marriages were declared legal this year and this is a step forward from what we were, I suppose. I feel that every human is different and should be respected in every aspect. Hope you like this poetry. #raise_your_voice_for_equal_human_rights.

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